OK, so I’m leaving behind the daily missives for the last few days as it really does boil down to cherish my family as the situation with Uncle Ken is ongoing.
It’s grief – for losing who he was and his knowing love (because I think he knows he loves us but I don’t think he knows why).
It’s protectiveness – for taking care of who he is now when he can’t speak for himself anymore.
It’s trying to control the uncontrollable – where he’s going next, his treatments, his home.
And it’s loss – because he’ll go home and we’ll visit but it’s not going to be the same.
On the more positive make money celebration front, I have a job interview for something I didn’t even apply for. And I have applied for a range of things so hopefully something will come of my applications even if the job interview doesn’t work out.
Family visits and I think the consensus is that he will go back to his home town although we still have to confirm that with the other cousins. I’m still adjusting to the news.
So not good news about my Uncle as it’s a brain tumour and a stroke and…and he’s going to need care. My gut reaction is to keep him close but I need to consider what’s best for him. These decisions aren’t easy and as my cousins point out, I’m not making them alone.
Still dealing with the fallout of my Uncle’s hospital stay. I went to the hospital in the evening and spent a half an hour with him.
I walked to the hospital today which isn’t as insane as it sounds as it is only down the road, (a mere 5 minute drive in the car usually when the roadworks aren’t around), although it was longer walking than I had anticipated.
On the way there I was seriously wondering if my legs were just going to stop working – they were so tired. Possibly I don’t do enough exercise and setting off on a 30 minute walk without prior build up isn’t a good thing. I also walked back because there was a serious lack of taxis – or signs pointing towards taxis at the hospital.
It was a nice visit in that I just sat and read my book while Uncle Ken napped. There wasn’t a big song and dance of ‘visiting’ which there was on Monday and Tuesday.
I’m not supposed to be going tomorrow (my sister is going in the afternoon) but I may go in the evening anyway (I feel guilty about just leaving him alone for so long in the hospital).
Visited Uncle Ken in hospital; talked with relatives about Uncle Ken. That’s pretty much my entire existence at the moment.
I have applied for jobs because I can’t put my life on hold.
cherish my family
Phone calls to tell family latest news is not fun.
Just for the record.